marykay25

Ok so I’ve been doing more clothes shopping than usual to prepare for my cruise.  Even though I’ve lost some weight, I can help but get depressed and anger with some of these stores!  One of the first places we went to was a place that specialized in formals and they carry up to 6x.  So I’m thinking I’m good to go right?  I nearly died when I had to get a 5x (size 20 in normal sizes) because the sizes they quoted me are for teens.  The selection was very low for the larger sizes so even though I was prepared to buy 2 dresses at just about any price, I only walked away with one.  I eventually found another one online but had to return it for a larger size.  I saw lots of cute things at some of the major dept stores but most of the things I liked were not in my size.  Most of the clothes I saw were frumpy, baggy, and looked like they belong in my grandma’s closet.  One store I went to had 3x more maternity clothes than plus size!  I’m fairly sure there are more curvy women out there than pregnant ones!  So I’ve been slightly depressed about the whole thing when I should be totally happy. 

The good news is, I found a few websites and got a few cute things.  But I’ve been pretty much off diet for a while and haven’t weighed in at all.  I probably wont until after vacation when I can re-focus my efforts but if anything, this experience has convinced me that I want/need to get down to a size where I can shop almost anywhere. 

I’m getting really excited about my cruise coming up.  I have about 1 month and 2 weeks till I leave for the Caribbean!  My niece and sister-in-law are coming down next week and we are going shopping.  I’m excited to show my niece some plus size places around here since she’s from a small town she doesn’t have much variety.  She sounds super excited to be going on the cruise too.  This will be her first trip out of the country and her first time to see the beach. 

 Dinner was awesome tonight!  I found a book at Half Price Books called “Saving Dinner the Low Carb Way.”  This is by far the best cookbook I’ve ever owned.  Tonight we had an Asian Stir Fry that was to die for!  I was literally shoveling the food in my mouth!  Bad habit I know but it was good.  Yum… 

Having either allergy issues or a cold right now and my nose is running like a faucet.  It’s driving me nuts!  Hope I get better soon.   

Ok I have too much in my head so I need to dump it out.  Been a weird 2 weeks.  My sister was in town the weekend before last and even though I’ve lost 25lbs, she didn’t notice.  But then again, she’s a size 4.  The day after she left, I came down with a cold.  So I’ve been out of it for the last week.   That’s good for weightloss, but not for excersizing.  Still have too much junk in my chest to work out very hard.  I’ve pledged (yet again) to get back to it on Monday.

I’ve also been rethinking my weight goal.  I put down my goal as 150 which is a significate loss but that is only 10 lbs lower than my lowest weight I can remember and that was still barely a size 14.  I was watching tv and seeing all these pretty girls and thinking about their sizes and the reality is I really should challenge myself to go lower.  Heathly BMI for my height is between 101 and 141.   101 aint gonna happen but 130-140 would probably be better for me.  Hard to imagine me at that weight since I was probably heavier than that in jr high. 

 My intermediate goal is to try to get to a size 16 before my cruise in April.  I’ve been looking online for formal dresses and most of them are 16 and below unless you are going for the matron of honor look which I’m not.  I’m just now barely in an 18 so it’s doable but won’t be easy.  But then again, what ever is easy eh?  

Work has also left me a bit paranoid.  I have a job and it doesnt seem to be going anywhere, but I’m unsure where my career path is going.  We just got assigned a new manager so we won’t be able to discuss this for a couple of weeks until he gets settled.  Even then, from everything else we are hearing, management isn’t sure the direction of our entire group so our manager may not even have answers.   It’s kinda all in flux and in limbo and I worry too much.  I’ve read that being over anxious is one of the many oh so fun symptoms of PCOS.  I was on anti-depressants briefly that helped with this but it gave me the munchies something fierce!  I also dont relish the idea of being on happy pills the rest of my life either so I’ve got to find a way to cope.  I know excersize is the answer for some people but not sure it’s the answer for me.  Guess we’ll take this one day at a time. 

I’m looking for some new places to get clothes.  I find that some plus size stores have things that are too frumpy or for older women.  I especially am going to need 2 formal dresses for my cruise in April.  If anyone knows of some great store or websites, please let me know.

Ones I go to now are:

Torrid, Avenue, Lane Bryant, JCPenney, Fashion Bug, Cato, Dress Barn.

I know that everyone’s body is different, but in general, approx how many pounds have you found that you have to lose before going down a size?  I started out in a size to big anyone so my approximations are shot.  Just curious what everyone else thinks.

It’s been a while since I updated this but in Dec I put a downpayment on a cruise for April.  Yesterday, I paid the balance so it’s a definate now!  I’m leaving April 10th for a southern carribbean, 7 day adventure with Celebrity cruiseline.  It’s my first cruise and I decided to take my 22 yr old niece with me who has never even seen the ocean!  It’s going to be fun just to see everything from her eyes.  With that in mind, it’s a pretty good motivation.  Today I’m offical at the 20lbs down mark with a way to go still but it’s progress.  My sister is coming to visit next month and I haven’t told anyone in my family that I’ve been working on my weight so we’ll see if she notices. 

Like most people, I’m great at starting out watching what I eat and excersizing, but pretty soon I typically lose my momentum and slip back into bad habits. So what I was thinking was that I need to have a reward for when I reach my mini goal and one for my major goal. Something tangible to strive for.   My original thought was to sign myself up for an “active” vacation for next year.  That would force me to keep working out, otherwise I’d be miserable and not be able to do anything on my trip but that trip is a bit expensive.  If anyone has any ideas on rewards, let me know. 

Oh and I thought of another thing to add to my list of Things I’m Looking Forward to….  Not being one of the biggest people at the gym.  

Things I’m looking forward to when I make my weight loss goals:

1.  I can shop for clothes ANYWHERE I WANT!!! 

2.  Along with number one, I don’t have to hear “we have clothes in all sizes” from the oh so helpful salesperson telling me in essence, yes we can even accomodate your size.

3.  My feet not hurting.  In recent years my feet have started hurting when I stand or walk too much.  Well I can’t blame them if they are having to support all this excess weight.

4.  Not having to deal with my sister (size 4) making off the cuff comments that she doesn’t realize hurt.  (ie You know you looked better when you were thinner.) DUH!

5. Not feeling too big to ride a rollercoaster.  With that, also not having to worry about fitting in to a airline seat with out asking for a seat belt extender. 

6. Going to a spa and having the robe close.

7.  Occassionally splurging on a dessert at a restaurant and not worrying if the wait person is judging me. 

8.  Not being afraid to be weighed at my dr’s office or to take my yearly annual assessment for my health insurance. 

9.  When a guy looks at me, I’m no longer wondering if they are looking at me cause I’m big or because I’m something good to look at.

10.  Not putting off things, like vacations, etc “until I lose weight”.